Methods of Mayhem — Methods of Mayhem

For an album that didn't make a lasting impression in its day, Methods of Mayhem's self-titled debut is an incredible glimpse back in time. Back to when Mötley Crüe's drummer — feeling creatively stifled and constrained — decided to strike out on his own, releasing a rap-rock album that demonstrated aptitude at neither genre, while leveraging a host of industry connections to achieve modest commercial success.

At the time of its release, I was only 16 years old and was largely unfamiliar with Mötley Crüe. I knew just enough about them, and heard just enough of their music to know I did not like them — or anything that could be considered glam or hair rock. Tommy Lee was more famous to me for being the guy whose sex tape with Pamela Anderson leaked to the public and his various run-ins with the law.

This is all to say that I was largely indifferent to the project, save for the involvement of other artists I liked. In fact, if it weren't for Fred Durst (Limp Bizkit) appearing the in the lead single, "Get Naked," this album might have passed me by entirely. The single saw some play on Much Music, but the bulk of the song's lyrics had to be censored so you were getting a compromised version of a song that really wasn't very good to begin with.

I remember seeing the video for "Get Naked" a few times, looking up the album on Napster and listening to it no more than 2-3 times before hitting Delete and not thinking about it for 25 years. As I listened to the record again, for this review, I was shocked that I actually remembered portions of some songs. I was also surprised at how many hired guns and guests were involved in this record, considering Tommy Lee is credited with playing so many instruments himself.

It would be easy to just dismiss this as some kind of cocaine-fueled 90s cash grab. Some greasy A&R rep gets on the phone: "Tommy, people love your huge dick and they also love rapping over guitars - why don't you find a way to rap about that girthsome hammer of yours and I'll book some studio time."

The thing is, Tommy Lee didn't need to do something like this for an easy pay day, that's what Mötley Crüe is for! The fact he released a second Methods of Mayhem album — of material exactly like this one — in 2010 tells me that this project is, at its core, a sincere endeavour. (I don't know which is worse, to be honest.)

The more appropriate read for Methods of Mayhem is that it is simply the vanity project of an incredibly successful dumbass. This is what happens when someone with millions of dollars and industry connections decides to get self-indulgent.

While the guest list is extensive, virtually everyone involved seems to have phoned in their contribution. In the case of Snoop Dogg, there is a non-zero chance his vocals were recorded on an actual answering machine. When you're getting big-timed by minimally exceptional Wu-Tang Clan affiliate U-God — who contributes a 38-second verse that just ends abruptly — it's safe to say no one took this project seriously.

Now, Methods of Mayhem purportedly began as a collaboration between Tommy Lee and a rapper named TiLo, whose career is so unheralded that he doesn't have a Wikipedia page despite also having been a member of C-tier nu metal band Hed PE. It is impossible to distinguish Lee and TiLo's vocals in many cases, they both sound heavily processed and indistinct. I don't know how much AutoTune and Pro Tools editing was done, but none of Lee's vocals sound particularly commanding or natural. Ironically, even the drums sound programmed and lifeless, which is the last thing I would expect on a project from a drummer with actual chops.

The record opens with someone receiving a collect call from 'Tommy' — a skit now incomprehensible to anyone under 30 years old — before launching into a crunchy guitar riff and sparing rock vocals from Tommy Lee. Long instrumental runs and a verse from Snoop Dogg mustering the urgency and emotion of a midday game of lawn bowling round out "Who The Hell Cares."

The next tracks, "Hypocritical" and "Anger Management" are more of the same: loud guitar punctuated with exceedingly basic lyrics that attempt to critique "the media," unspecified haters and backstabbers. Even for an era renowned for semi-contrived, directionless anger, this record feels especially insincere. These are the crude complaints of a man who has never suffered in his life — save for his self-inflicted run-ins with the law — and isn't even capable of articulating these grievances coherently.

"Get Naked" is easily the best song on the record. It's also absolutely terrible; it starts with Lee rapping the line "seventy seven million dollars made from watching me cum under the sun ... shootin' my jizzy jizzum, the woody has rizzy risen" and, somehow, it only gets worse. He complains about not making money off the sex tape, brags about his dick and then hands things over to Fred Durst, who turns in a stunningly low effort 5-line verse. Lil Kim rounds things out with even more bars of graphic sexuality, outclassing everyone else on the mic with ease. It's obvious why this was the lead single, but it's a mid-level novelty song crutching on the reputations of all involved — much like the rest of the album.

"New Skin" opens with what sounds like someone's attempt to recreate the intro to Nine Inch Nails' "Closer" in Fruity Loops, only to shift into a generic alt-rock number that inexplicably also features Kid Rock doing the one thing he knows: mid-level rapping about the merits of Kid Rock. It's like someone jammed 3 songs together, none of them particularly good.

"Crash" is about crashing cars, a topic Lee no doubt learned extensively from bandmate Vince Neil. Instrumentally it sounds like a generic dance remix of of an even more generic radio rock song. "Metamorphosis" is equally unremarkable, showcasing a glossy production job and little else below the surface. Lee's vocals sound very edited, delivering immemorable and uninspiring lines. Either he had very little involvement in the lyrics or he's incapable of articulating his own life experience in any meaningful way; perhaps both.

In spite of all the criticisms, there is a lot of (unintentional) entertainment to be found on record, like the absurd opening skit to "Proposition Fuck You"; the rest of the song for that matter; or the fact that 2 of the last 3 tracks on the album are effectively Crystal Method instrumentals under the name 'Scott Kirkland,' and the other is a brief segue.

The album is only 36 minutes long and Tommy completely checks out for the last quarter of it. For a man who supposedly felt unable to express himself in his main band, Tommy Lee has very little to say with Methods of Mayhem. He wants to celebrate his bad boy image but hates the public scrutiny, an absurd dichotomy but not unsurprising for a guy who once tried to be clever with a swastika tattoo (story).

As ridiculous as this whole project is, it really didn't stand out that much in its day. The mainstream was saturated with rap-rock / nu metal and Methods of Mayhem was, ultimately, doing nothing different than the likes of Limp Bizkit, Kid Rock or their contemporaries, and what it had on offer was replacement level at best. It wasn't even bad enough to be truly memorable, it was just a thing that happened.

I'm looking forward to another 25 years of not thinking about this album.

Summary

Not good at all. A terrible record, but an amazing historical artifact of nu metal and the late 90s in general. Absolutely worth a look for the novelty factor, even if the songs are mediocre at best. It's not that this record has gotten better with age, but it's even more surreal to contemplate in 2025.

Album Information

Release date: December 7th, 1999
Record label: MCA Records

Tommy Lee — vocals, guitar, drums, percussion
TiLo — vocals
Snoop Dogg — vocals (track 1)
Kid Rock — vocals (track 5)
Fred Durst — vocals (track 4)
Lil Kim — vocals (track 4)
George Clinton — vocals (track 4)
U-God — vocals (track 10)
Filthee Immigrants — vocals (track 6)
Kai Marcus — guitar
Phil X — guitar
Danny Lohner — guitar
Ken Andrews — guitar
Scott Phaff — guitar
Randy Jackson — bass
Chris Chaney — bass
Audrey Wiechman — bass
Mixmaster Mike — turntables (track 4)
Scott Kirkland — keyboards (tracks 9 and 11)

Track Listing

1. Who the Hell Cares
2. Hypocritical
3. Anger Management
4. Get Naked
5. New Skin
6. Proposition Fuck You
7. Crash
8. Metamorphosis
9. Narcotic
10. Mr. Onsomeothershits
11. Spun

Link: spotify

—by Derek

Published: February 16th, 2025.